So, I don't know if I've posted it or not, but my grandma makes this delicious, total-heart-attack sweet potato casserole every Thanksgiving that's always the (other) highlight of my meal...(I cannot discount my one true love, stuffing).
She makes it with butter, sweet potatoes, crushed walnuts and a buttload of brown sugar. It's effin' delicious, but you just can't eat it every day. Anyway, I decided to make my own, slightly less sweet version to go with a little simple dinner of wild rice (microwave packet from Mom was -surprise!- totally delicious) and wilted spinach, which was purchased with E's food stamps...awesome.
To digress, I don't know what it is about wilted spinach, but I fucking *love* it. I mean, I'll go back for thirds. But it has to have balsamic vinegar on it. I hate fresh spinach (it doesn't CRUNCH the way I want my lettuce to crunch, ok?), but steamed for a bit and splashed with balsamic? Ohhh, yeahhh. My sisters and I used to seriously look forward to wilted spinach as kids. Weird, I know.
ANYHOO...so, I had a few yams and a few sweet potatoes, so I cut 'em in halves and threw 'em in a pot of boiling water for tenish minutes. (This is called blanching, kids, and it's really important otherwise your potatoes will be too hard and won't cook right).
Once blanched, I cooled the potatoes slightly and sliced them into about 1-cm thick slices, which I arranged in a lovely pattern in order to properly mix the yams and sweeties. You can do whatever you want - go ahead, make it ugly. I don't care.
Where G-ma sprinkles butter and liberal amounts of brown sugar between each layer of potatoes, I drizzled a small amount of futter and a very small pinch of brown sugar, coupled with a chopped yeller' onion and some basil flakes.
I was finished after about four layers (I believe I used 4 potatoes to start). Then, I popped the bad boy in the oven on about 375 degrees, and left it for....about half an hour, until the potatoes start to lose form and get soft enough to cut with a spoon.
So, a slightly less bad-for-you version of G-ma's special Thanksgiving Coronary Surprise! Deliciousness!
Showing posts with label futter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label futter. Show all posts
04 January 2011
04 December 2009
I Can't Believe it's POT Butter!
...And you won't believe how easy it is to make! Yes, now you too can be an expert at creating tasty treats that will get you high. It is totally awesome, and no smoke is involved, so no one has to know....
So basically, the active molecule of weed, THC, is lipophilic, which means it bonds to fat molecules (lipo = fat, phil = love, so THC loves fat.) For us, this means that in order to infuse our dish with THC WITHOUT having to chew down a bunch of nasty plant bits, we must first create an infusion of butter/futter/oil and weed.
What we do is, we call our guy, and ask him if he has some shake. Shake works nicely because you don't have to grind it, and it is about 1/2 the price of bud. Anyway, you can scale the amount of shake you use to how potent you want your butter to be - I'd say about 3-4 grams of bud OR 6-7 grams of shake per stick (1/2 cup - did you know that a stick of butter equals 1/2 a cup? Now you do) of butter/oil.
So first, we melt our futter. I strongly suggest using margarine instead of actual butter, because margarine won't burn, and it can get complicated to make it using real butter if you want to prevent burnage...I won't get into it today.
Anyway, so oil or futter. I find most brownie boxes (a classic) call for oil, so that is why I am mentioning it here.
So, put the fat in a nice pot and put it on medium-low heat. Once it's melty if it's margarine, dump in the green stuff. Stir occasionally over a period of about 2 hours. If you're in a hurry, you CAN turn the heat up high and super-cook it for a shorter time period (15-20 minutes) but you will end up with a much more weedy-tasting finished product. I highly reccomend the slow-heat.
Once it's done cooking, go ahead and remove from heat and let it sit while you set up the next step. This is where it gets a little hot and dangerous, so kids, don't do this without your mom or dad's help. What your next task is, is to strain from the futter/oil ALL the little green particulate matter that is floating around. Now that it's been cooked, it's useless and should be thrown out - do not smoke it for the love of god. All the good stuff is now in the futter.
So, what we do is, we acquire a good material for straining the butter, and secure it snugly to the opening of whatever receptacle you want to pour the stuff into. Good materials to use to strain the butter include CHEESECLOTH (if you are fancy - but you can get it cheap at the gro,) COFFEE FILTER (if you drink coffee, I guess,) or a CLEAN piece of NYLON PANTYHOSE (Emphasis on the clean). All of these are good because they won't let nary a FIBER of the used-up plant into the receptacle. I use a pyrex measuring cup, and a rubber-band to secure the cheesecloth around the opening. I also suggest pushing a small "dip" into the straining material, so you have a space to pour the liquid into.
Make sure you pour VERY SLOWLY, as it will take time for the oils to drip through the material. It is also very fucking hot at this point, so please be careful.
Once you have strained your oil or butter, it is ready for use! Use just as you would regular butter or oil as is called for in your recipe. Of course, you can always cut with "plain" butter to dilute the potency. Now you can experiment with all kinds of funny foods! Baked Potatos! Stoney Soup! Magic Muffins!
Godspeed, and enjoy.
So basically, the active molecule of weed, THC, is lipophilic, which means it bonds to fat molecules (lipo = fat, phil = love, so THC loves fat.) For us, this means that in order to infuse our dish with THC WITHOUT having to chew down a bunch of nasty plant bits, we must first create an infusion of butter/futter/oil and weed.
What we do is, we call our guy, and ask him if he has some shake. Shake works nicely because you don't have to grind it, and it is about 1/2 the price of bud. Anyway, you can scale the amount of shake you use to how potent you want your butter to be - I'd say about 3-4 grams of bud OR 6-7 grams of shake per stick (1/2 cup - did you know that a stick of butter equals 1/2 a cup? Now you do) of butter/oil.
So first, we melt our futter. I strongly suggest using margarine instead of actual butter, because margarine won't burn, and it can get complicated to make it using real butter if you want to prevent burnage...I won't get into it today.
Anyway, so oil or futter. I find most brownie boxes (a classic) call for oil, so that is why I am mentioning it here.
So, put the fat in a nice pot and put it on medium-low heat. Once it's melty if it's margarine, dump in the green stuff. Stir occasionally over a period of about 2 hours. If you're in a hurry, you CAN turn the heat up high and super-cook it for a shorter time period (15-20 minutes) but you will end up with a much more weedy-tasting finished product. I highly reccomend the slow-heat.
Once it's done cooking, go ahead and remove from heat and let it sit while you set up the next step. This is where it gets a little hot and dangerous, so kids, don't do this without your mom or dad's help. What your next task is, is to strain from the futter/oil ALL the little green particulate matter that is floating around. Now that it's been cooked, it's useless and should be thrown out - do not smoke it for the love of god. All the good stuff is now in the futter.
So, what we do is, we acquire a good material for straining the butter, and secure it snugly to the opening of whatever receptacle you want to pour the stuff into. Good materials to use to strain the butter include CHEESECLOTH (if you are fancy - but you can get it cheap at the gro,) COFFEE FILTER (if you drink coffee, I guess,) or a CLEAN piece of NYLON PANTYHOSE (Emphasis on the clean). All of these are good because they won't let nary a FIBER of the used-up plant into the receptacle. I use a pyrex measuring cup, and a rubber-band to secure the cheesecloth around the opening. I also suggest pushing a small "dip" into the straining material, so you have a space to pour the liquid into.
Make sure you pour VERY SLOWLY, as it will take time for the oils to drip through the material. It is also very fucking hot at this point, so please be careful.
Once you have strained your oil or butter, it is ready for use! Use just as you would regular butter or oil as is called for in your recipe. Of course, you can always cut with "plain" butter to dilute the potency. Now you can experiment with all kinds of funny foods! Baked Potatos! Stoney Soup! Magic Muffins!
Godspeed, and enjoy.
30 November 2009
Fakesgiving
Oooye, it's been a busy week, what with that freakin' holiday and all. I have been so busy buying fucking x-mess gifts, that I haven't had time at all to get experimental in my kitchen.
The good news is, I learned that the easy fruit cobbler (apple, in my case) is SO easy, you can whip that bitch up with a ragin' hangover and have it's hot ass out o' the ov' and into the car in less than an hour! And also that I really needn't have bothered, as everyone else's desserts were store-bought.
Oh, here's a little something to keep you entertained: how about if you made rice crispy treats with...fruity pebbles?! Yeah, you bet your ass it's as exciting as it sounds. If you don't know, all you need for krispy treats is marshmallows, futter, and cereal. Like, a slice or two of butter, a few handfuls of mallow (however much mallow you require, I guess) and melt that shit on medium until it's goo, and then dump in the cereal and use your stronger hand to stir that shit. Then dump it in a pan and press it and let it cool (press it in using well-buttered fingers, this will help a lot and it is also fun to butter your fingers) BUT YOU KNEW THIS ALREADY.
The only thing that changes is the cereal. I also only did about 50-50 krispies and fruities, so it wouldn't be TOO fruity (that shit is HELLA fruity!)
BUT BUT BUUUUUT here comes the best part: I like to add a little special green butter* with these - it only takes about 1 tablespoon - and the fruity pebbles COMPLETELY cover the taste of that funky, funky butter.
*by "special green butter" i am of course referring to a homemade herbal infusion of butter and marijuana....recipe to follow?
The good news is, I learned that the easy fruit cobbler (apple, in my case) is SO easy, you can whip that bitch up with a ragin' hangover and have it's hot ass out o' the ov' and into the car in less than an hour! And also that I really needn't have bothered, as everyone else's desserts were store-bought.
Oh, here's a little something to keep you entertained: how about if you made rice crispy treats with...fruity pebbles?! Yeah, you bet your ass it's as exciting as it sounds. If you don't know, all you need for krispy treats is marshmallows, futter, and cereal. Like, a slice or two of butter, a few handfuls of mallow (however much mallow you require, I guess) and melt that shit on medium until it's goo, and then dump in the cereal and use your stronger hand to stir that shit. Then dump it in a pan and press it and let it cool (press it in using well-buttered fingers, this will help a lot and it is also fun to butter your fingers) BUT YOU KNEW THIS ALREADY.
The only thing that changes is the cereal. I also only did about 50-50 krispies and fruities, so it wouldn't be TOO fruity (that shit is HELLA fruity!)
BUT BUT BUUUUUT here comes the best part: I like to add a little special green butter* with these - it only takes about 1 tablespoon - and the fruity pebbles COMPLETELY cover the taste of that funky, funky butter.
*by "special green butter" i am of course referring to a homemade herbal infusion of butter and marijuana....recipe to follow?
09 November 2009
The Best Cookies Ever
Get ready for the best, most deliciously easy cookie recipe this side of your mother.
If you are fancy and have a food processor, you are golden. If you are like the rest of us and never thought you needed a food processor until now, it's okay...the machine isn't actually necessary to cookie success. It is also made almost entirely out of cheap crap, though I am kinda fancy, and I have a few fancy ingredients that I like in my cookies....if you have the opportunity to splurge a bit, I would definitely encourage it.
Gear: Standard big mixing bowl and baking sheet. Food processor if you have one, and a measuring cup or two would be really handy at this point.
Ingreeds:
~1.5 c flour
~1/2 c white sugar
~1/2 c well-packed brown sugar (just smash it down until you can't fit any more in the cup measure)
~1 egg
~vanilla/almond extract.
~salt (approx 1/4 tsp)
~baking SODA (orange box this time - approx 1/2 tsp) ***It is utterly essential that you don't forget this step, as the soda is what causes the chemical reaction that makes the cookies rise and expand as they cook. If you miss this step, you will end up with little hard crunchy balls of crap-cookie. Don't do it!***
~1/2 cup (1 whole stick) of futter. (*if using a food processor: cut chilled butter into approx 8 pieces. Otherwise, soften the butter to a partial-melty state)
~chocolate chips, coconut, nuts, or whatever you like in your cookies!!!
Directs:
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees
2. In big bowl (or in food processor) Combine sugars, egg, butter, vanilla, salt and baking soda. Blend thoroughly until it is lovely and creamy in texture. ** I usually use almond extract for these cookies, because i just LOVE the taste of almond. It is almost twice as expensive as vanilla extract, so it's kind of a luxury, but imitation vanillas and almonds are available in your supermarket, too. Whatever you want, really, but I say almond extract is the secret ingredient that no one will realize is making their cookies so delicious!**
3. Add flour to creamy mixture, and blend again until it is a homogeneous mixture that is smooth, yet thick and doughy. It will become difficult to stir with a spoon, but I believe in you. Persevere!
4. Add your goodies. My other secret ingredient at this point is sweetened, shredded coconut. Now, you might be thinking, "eeew, no! Coconut? You must be coco-NUTS!" but hear me out: you can hardly taste the coconuttiness, but what it DOES do is impart a long-lasting chewy moistness to your cookies, that will make them delectable for weeks to come. I'd say about 1/2 cup of coconut, and probably another 1/3 or so chips of whatever flavor....you can estimate though, go ahead and add more if you want them.
To BAAAAKE:
~arrange dough in balls approx 1" thick (I use a reg'ler old spoon to measure even blobs. They don't really have to be "balls" either - just roundish blobs. Make sure they have at least 1.5 inches between balls, so they have space to flatten out.
~put them in the oven for 12 minutes.
~Done. delicious. your whole house smells good and you are a hero to all your friends. Congratulations.
**Tip: for soft cookies, allow them to cool on a hard surface, like your (clean) kitchen counter, or on some papertowels or newsprint to soak up the grease. If you want them crunchy, put them on a drying rack.
Go forth, be fruitful and cookie-fy!
If you are fancy and have a food processor, you are golden. If you are like the rest of us and never thought you needed a food processor until now, it's okay...the machine isn't actually necessary to cookie success. It is also made almost entirely out of cheap crap, though I am kinda fancy, and I have a few fancy ingredients that I like in my cookies....if you have the opportunity to splurge a bit, I would definitely encourage it.
Gear: Standard big mixing bowl and baking sheet. Food processor if you have one, and a measuring cup or two would be really handy at this point.
Ingreeds:
~1.5 c flour
~1/2 c white sugar
~1/2 c well-packed brown sugar (just smash it down until you can't fit any more in the cup measure)
~1 egg
~vanilla/almond extract.
~salt (approx 1/4 tsp)
~baking SODA (orange box this time - approx 1/2 tsp) ***It is utterly essential that you don't forget this step, as the soda is what causes the chemical reaction that makes the cookies rise and expand as they cook. If you miss this step, you will end up with little hard crunchy balls of crap-cookie. Don't do it!***
~1/2 cup (1 whole stick) of futter. (*if using a food processor: cut chilled butter into approx 8 pieces. Otherwise, soften the butter to a partial-melty state)
~chocolate chips, coconut, nuts, or whatever you like in your cookies!!!
Directs:
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees
2. In big bowl (or in food processor) Combine sugars, egg, butter, vanilla, salt and baking soda. Blend thoroughly until it is lovely and creamy in texture. ** I usually use almond extract for these cookies, because i just LOVE the taste of almond. It is almost twice as expensive as vanilla extract, so it's kind of a luxury, but imitation vanillas and almonds are available in your supermarket, too. Whatever you want, really, but I say almond extract is the secret ingredient that no one will realize is making their cookies so delicious!**
3. Add flour to creamy mixture, and blend again until it is a homogeneous mixture that is smooth, yet thick and doughy. It will become difficult to stir with a spoon, but I believe in you. Persevere!
4. Add your goodies. My other secret ingredient at this point is sweetened, shredded coconut. Now, you might be thinking, "eeew, no! Coconut? You must be coco-NUTS!" but hear me out: you can hardly taste the coconuttiness, but what it DOES do is impart a long-lasting chewy moistness to your cookies, that will make them delectable for weeks to come. I'd say about 1/2 cup of coconut, and probably another 1/3 or so chips of whatever flavor....you can estimate though, go ahead and add more if you want them.
To BAAAAKE:
~arrange dough in balls approx 1" thick (I use a reg'ler old spoon to measure even blobs. They don't really have to be "balls" either - just roundish blobs. Make sure they have at least 1.5 inches between balls, so they have space to flatten out.
~put them in the oven for 12 minutes.
~Done. delicious. your whole house smells good and you are a hero to all your friends. Congratulations.
**Tip: for soft cookies, allow them to cool on a hard surface, like your (clean) kitchen counter, or on some papertowels or newsprint to soak up the grease. If you want them crunchy, put them on a drying rack.
Go forth, be fruitful and cookie-fy!
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